Ready, Set, Let Go: Preparing Your Child for Freshman Year as a College Athlete

Dear Coach Bryant,

My son is about to start his freshman year playing water polo in college, and I’m excited for him—but also a nervous wreck. He’s going to be juggling a rigorous academic load, intense training, and trying to earn playing time on a very competitive team. I want to be supportive without being overbearing. What can we do now to help set him up for a successful start?

Nervous in Newport Beach

Dear Nervous,

You’re not alone—sending your child off to play college sports is a proud but nerve-wracking milestone. It’s natural to feel a mix of excitement and anxiety. College athletics introduces a whole new level of independence and competition, and watching your son transition from high school standout to rookie teammate can be an adjustment for both of you. While you can’t control how much playing time he’ll get, there are important things you can help him prepare for—ones that will influence his experience and success both in and out of the pool. Here are my tips:

Make Sure He Shows Up Fit and Ready

One of the biggest mistakes I see with incoming freshmen is assuming that summer is a break. It’s not. Athletes who arrive out of shape are at greater risk of injury and often spend the first weeks catching up rather than competing. Encourage your son to stick to a training routine that mirrors the intensity of college-level expectations. He doesn’t need to overdo it—but cardio conditioning, strength work, and skill reps should be part of his weekly plan. Arriving ready earns respect quickly.

Help Him Learn the Ropes Before He Needs Them

College campuses are packed with support resources: academic advisors, mental health services, athletic trainers, study halls, and nutrition support. But they’re only helpful if your son knows they exist and feels comfortable accessing them. Before he leaves, help him explore where those services are located and who to contact. Normalize the idea that asking for help is smart, not weak—especially in those first few months when everything feels overwhelming.

Learn to Navigate the Team Culture

Team dynamics are a learning curve. Freshmen don’t always know when and how to ask questions or voice concerns. That’s where the chain of command comes in. Teach your son to start with his captain or upperclassmen before bringing small concerns directly to the coaching staff. It’s respectful, it builds trust within the team, and it helps your son learn how to problem-solve. These early habits will serve him well both in and out of the pool.

Let Him Go

As hard as it is, this is the moment to step back. Resist the urge to over-text your son with constant check-ins. College athletes are busy from morning to night—and if he’s not responding, it probably means he’s doing just fine. In fact, no news often is good news. Give him space to bond with teammates, settle into campus life, and take ownership of his experience. If you do reach out, keep messages short, positive, and pressure-free. And remember: your calm, confident presence in the background gives him permission to fly.

The Reality

College sports require toughness, time management, and self-reliance—and your son is about to gain all three. Playing time will come down to the coach’s decisions and the team’s needs, but your son’s preparation, attitude, and work ethic are entirely in his control. Help him focus on the parts he can influence: showing up ready, asking questions respectfully, using available resources, and staying committed to the process. And for you? Trust the foundation you’ve built. Give him the space to grow, mess up, and learn. You raised him for this moment—now let him live it.